You, Dear Girl

You dear girl, are perfect in all your imperfection.

                               Frida Kahlo by Lucienne Bloch, 1933.   Click on the image to  link.

                             Frida Kahlo by Lucienne Bloch, 1933. Click on the image to link.

You have weathered a few storms, fought a good fight and have been the last one standing. There are lines on your face, grey streaks in your hair, creases in your belly, which you are told to fix, to flatten, to colour, to change but you know — I know — this can only mean your body, your beautiful body, is a canvas of a life filled to the brim with joy and pain, love and sadness, with a deep understanding of your self-worth, even if it was shaky.

But the shaky self-confidence soon unfolded into certainty of self, all the parts that make the whole: the flaws, the blemishes, the weaknesses alongside the courage, the femininity, the power you hold between your legs. You have taken their imposed standards and rewritten your own beauty laws, your own map for milestones and achievements, your own protocol on a life well-lived.

You, dear girl, are all grace and even more grit.

   Nina Simone. Click on image for link (don't have original image for photo credit)

 Nina Simone. Click on image for link (don't have original image for photo credit)

You stood tall when you were told to sit down and be quiet, you spoke louder when you were told to whisper, you made even more demands when you were told you were too bossy. The path has not been easy, the one that lead you away from a place of conformity, monotony, formality. You chose to beat down your path, carve your own way, find your North star when no one else could see it and there were days when you couldn't either, but you knew it was there and trusted it to guide you to the place that exists only for you, dear girl.

The choices you've made have not always been right or good but they were the best you could do with the knowledge you had. And when shit went wrong or sideways, when you were brought to your knees in defeat, when you knew you failed, you didn't stop. You clawed your way back up, broken and bruised, even more defiant and determined than ever before.

You, dear girl, are a fighter.

Failure doesn't mean the end for you, it simply means another chance to start agin; another chance to fight a good fight. It may look like a roadblock to others but not to you. It is not so great that it cannot be torn down, circumvented or reconstructed; not so great it can't be repainted, redecorated or repurposed. There is always a way to move forward. But you know this, my dear girl.

When they said don't, you said watch me.

When they said you can't, you said I already did.

When they said do it this way, you say I'll find my own way.

And you have.

                    Diana Vreeland. Click on image for link (don't have original image for photo credit)

                   Diana Vreeland. Click on image for link (don't have original image for photo credit)

Reading the quote I posted on Instagram this morning by Elizabeth Gilbert, I got to thinking about all the great women who have silently or vocally encouraged me to move forward, to fight my own good fight, to find comfort in my own imperfection. I write these words for you. I may not know you, I may never see your face, but if you are out there carving your own path, you, dear girl, have inspired me.

Thank you.


On a side note, if you don't follow Elizabeth Gilbert on Facebook, I would recommend doing it. She's just the loveliest of lovely women. She is a good reason social media can be fun and inspiring and a way to find connection.